Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Questionable Jones No. 13

Sometimes, dialog is perfect. It says just the right thing in a way that cannot be said better. Sometimes, it's painful to listen to and it makes you cringe.

Question: "What was the best/worst line of dialog in the series?"

Scott's Answer: Jeez, where to start?! These are some of the most quotable films in history. Even though he quotes someone else, I've always been fond of Henry Jones' line, "I suddenly remembered my Charlemagne: 'Let my armies be the rocks and the trees and the birds in the sky.'" Also: "It's not the years, honey; it's the mileage." Worst line? Almost anything in Crystal Skull, especially anything uttered by John Hurt. I've never felt so embarrassed for an actor!

Andrew's Answer: The line that sticks with me also becomes a bit of frustration. In Raiders, Marcus Brody delivers this amazing line about how the Ark is not meant to be discovered: "Marion's the least of your worries right now... I mean that for nearly three thousand years man has been searching for the lost ark. Its not something to be taken lightly. No one knows its secrets. Its like nothing you've ever gone after before." This line perfectly sets up the entire movie. It's mystical, it's warning, and it's philosophical, all at once. This is one of those lines that defines a film. And it is this line which really pains me when they turn Brody into a fool in Crusade. A fool would not have delivered this line. Honorable mention, "you could warn them. . . if only you spoke Hovitos."

Worst line of dialog is a good question. Most of Crystal Skull probably qualifies, but I'm going back to Crusade for the entire scene involving Sallah and Brody, where Brody acts like an idiot while Sallah keeps telling Brody "Run!" as if the English speaking Germans somehow wouldn't know.

15 comments:

tryanmax said...

Wow, Jones dialogue is so crisp and tight throughout the series (and I'm even including Skull in that statement--bad story told undeservedly well). It makes it really hard to pick a "best." I think my favorite is when Indy is describing the contents of the Ark including the Ten Commandments and says, "Didn't you guys ever go to Sunday School?"

Worst line? Nothing specific comes to mind, but I always though things got a little cheesy at the end of Last Crusade.

KRS said...

That flip on Brody alone nearly torpedoed Crusade for me because it completely undid Brody's character from Lost Ark. His intellectual weight and authority over Indy is a key component that should have remained untarnished. The estimable Denholm Elliot can play either sage or fool convincingly, but it is beyond unkind to do this to him.

Best line: "We named the dog Indiana."

Worst line: “Mola Ram, prepare to meet Kali ... in HELL!”

AndrewPrice said...

tryanmax, The series does have excellent writing. There are no obviously stupid lines, little fluff, and no nonsense.

That is a very funny and memorable line that really does say so much: "Didn't you guys go to Sunday School." Nice!

AndrewPrice said...

KRS, I concur, that really bothered me. I saw Brody as smart, cautious and respected, not as a buffoon.

That's a great line! "Indi is named after the dog?"

Nice worst line. Yeah, that wasn't a particularly good comeback.

PikeBishop said...

As far as Marcus Brody goes, I wonder what went through Denholm Elliot's mind as he read each script and how it affected his interpretation of the character. I can see how in the first film, he could come off as a competent, but still kind of prissy, hot house flower academic, a bit eccentric due to too many years in the books, but "lost in his own museum?" No way.

T-Rav said...

Hey now, I thought the kiss-off to Mola Ram was pretty good! Though my favorite line of dialogue is the knight's deadpan line in Crusade: "He chose...poorly."

Worst line? "Jonesie!"

ScottDS said...

T-Rav -

My friends and I use the knight's line all the time. :-)

ScottDS said...

Pike -

I don't know what they were thinking. I imagine they wanted to make Crusade lighter after the complaints re: Doom, but it's a bit too light at times.

Dwizzum said...

Best line: Shoot them, shoot them both.

AndrewPrice said...

Pike, I suppose he probably thought it was a great opportunity to show his comedic side, but I would have been scratching my head and asking where this was coming from.

AndrewPrice said...

T-Rav and Scott, "He chose poorly" is a quote I use all the time too. :)

AndrewPrice said...

Dwizzum, That is a great line too. That tells you everything you need to know about this bad guy.

Lisa said...

"Top. Men."

AndrewPrice said...

Lisa, Good one! :D

Backthrow said...

Best line... hard or me to rate, lots of good ones, especially in RAIDERS (and "He chose... poorly" is immortal... no pun intended, lol).

One of the many I like is when Sallah asks Indy what he's going to do about the ark on the truck--

Indy: "I don't know... I'm making this up as I go."

And this exchange was fun:

Belloq: "Who knows, in a thousand years, maybe even you will be worth something."

Indy: "Ha-Haa! Son of a bitch..."

Worst line... probably something in CRYSTAL SKULL, except I've largely blotted that turkey out of my mind, apart from some stupid visuals that stubbornly refuse to vanish from my mind's eye. I really can't remember any specific dialogue spoken in the film.

That being said, I guess it'd be a Willie Scott whine-line, or the goof-ified Marcus trying to make a funny: "See? The *PEN* is mightier than the SWORD, ha-ha!". Ugh.

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